Monday, March 3, 2025
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Neon Lords Calls Forth The VHS Apocalypse


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I spent quite a lot of my youth watching films that had been made with low, low budgets. Whether or not on HBO, rented from the native video retailer or with robotic buddies like Crow and Tom Servo, I like these little chunks of creativity from individuals who possibly don’t all the time have the expertise (or cash) to correctly categorical their concepts. Designer Brian Shutter loves these films as nicely. There are quite a lot of callbacks to those films in Neon Lords of the Poisonous Wasteland. He despatched me residence from a conference with a replica of the principles in hand. Did I benefit from the glow? Let’s play to seek out out.

Neon Lords of the Poisonous Wasteland casts gamers as heroes in an unlikely apocalypse wandering the world attempting to cease warlords and alien entities from ending up the top of the world that began when aliens and magic each determined to return to Earth at across the similar time. These are usually not adventures in dusty Mad-Max model deserts however one thing extra just like the city wreckage of Class of Nuke Em Excessive or Night time of the Comet. The general tone is darkish however foolish. How else might you describe a sport the place the character courses embrace mutant unicorns and killer robots constructed to appear like Ronald Regan?

The sport is modeled on basic B/X D&D with roll beneath stat checks and roll over saves and fight. Every class is given distinctive skills loaded with taste. Sure, there’s a stealth primarily based class however it’s an 80’s model ninja loaded with loads of Chuck Norris references. The courses are additional personalized with skills powered by factors of swimming pools and every having a bespoke essential success desk referred to as To The Max. Even a personality’s haircut issues. That’s how the designer will get across the sticky wicket of races, ancestries and heritages. Your mohawk or mullet alter your potential scores or provides you an additional cool factor to do.

The excessive design continues within the graphic parts chock stuffed with VHS stickers and wild headers that by no means met a font they didn’t like. The sport appears to be like like somebody took all their outdated doodled up D&D notebooks, stuffed them right into a Trapper Keeper after which threw that down the steps of their native Blockbuster Video. This isn’t a sport about tense tactical encounters or coronary heart wrenching drama. This can be a sport the place you do a backflip throwing a fist stuffed with exploding ninja stars whereas your buddy the Brutalcorn lays down cowl fireplace with double Uzis. It’s model over substance.

I actually just like the model. Along with these direct to video movies, Neon Lords of the Poisonous Wasteland additionally looks like a tribute to the nice 90s kitchen sink video games like RIFTS and Torg. These video games weren’t involved with sport steadiness or tight mechanics. They needed to get you and your pals telling tales about cyborgs punching dinosaurs inside a vampire’s citadel. This sport feels just like the model somebody put collectively from their older siblings copies of these video games earlier than their dad and mom threw the books out because of the Satanic Panic. That’s why the courses really feel a little bit prime heavy. This sport strikes me as constructed for one photographs and brief marketing campaign play and the designer desires to get the enjoyable toys within the palms of gamers extra shortly. A participant shouldn’t have to attend till fifth stage to have a keytar duel wil Devil.

What put the sport excessive was the plain love and humor the designer has in regards to the style. Right here the sport jogs my memory of one other nice 90’s sport in Feng Shui. Comedy is tough and it is even more durable when it’s important to slip it right into a e book in between stage profit charts. In fact the spell descriptions are often film references. That is additionally a world the place Macho Man Randy Savage is the chief deity and gamers should buy 3-liter bottles of Excessive Nacho Flavored Mega Fizz. There’s an journey that’s an homage to Chopping Mall, the best teenage furnishings retailer orgy interrupted by killer mallcop robots movie ever made. If any of these ideas made you crack a smile or unlocked a reminiscence, Neon Lords of the Poisonous Wasteland is likely to be price trying out.

Backside Line: Neon Lords of the Poisonous Wasteland is an ideal mixture of Saturday morning cartoon humor, Saturday afternoon video games with associates and Saturday evening film marathons that solely cease when the VCR runs out of tapes to observe.
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